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Thank you so much for your interest in learning more about our family's journey with selective mutism and sensory processing disorder.  What I discuss in my posts are based soley on our family's experiences and opinions.  I am not a doctor or health professional and know others may have different experiences and opinions than my own.  My oldest son was diagnosed with SM in August 2013, then SPD in 2014.  Our youngest does not have SM, but is highly sensitive like his brother and has various sensory issues as well, some the same and some very different from his brother.    The names of my children have been changed in my posts to protect their privacy.  The purpose of this blog is to share our experiences with others who may benefit from the knowledge we have gained along our journey.

As you go through the archive of posts, the years that have more than 15 posts require you to click on the "Older posts" link at the bottom right of the blog roll to get to more posts from that year.

Here is some background info that will give a better idea of how we started our sm and spd journey before reading my posts:

Our oldest, Thomas, was always a sort of high strung baby.  He slept great and napped great, but we would never say he was laid back.  He was a very happy baby and loved being held and walked around.  He loved exploring his little world.  Looking back to his baby book, we had written as early as 10-11 months that he was very shy and took a long time to warm up to others.  Everyone always said (and still does) that he is very observant.  He had mature speech very early.  His first words were empty and bucket.  Around 20 months, his language really exploded and everyone commented on how clear and extensive his vocabulary was.  He could recite whole books after hearing them only a few times and would correct us if we said a different word or paraphrased when reading to him.  

Thomas was an introvert, just like my husband and I.  He was always slow to warm up.  Whenever anyone would come over that was new or he hadn’t seen in a while he would stay very still and want to sit on our lap.  We thought it was a little strange, but really enjoyed the rest from the crazy toddler who would run around when no one was there.  We saw it as a nice break!  It wasn’t until his second year that we started feeling like there were a lot of red flags. 

Inside the house, he was wild and full of energy, but outside of the house he was much different.  He had a lot of trouble at the playground with other kids.  He stopped enjoying swinging and sliding in his second year.   He would practically dive off of something at the park if someone else wanted to sit with him, i.e. seesaw or merry go round.  If he was going up a ladder and someone started coming up behind him, he’d panic.  We just thought he would outgrow this.  He has always been extremely cautious.   He did not enjoy amusement parks and we found it so strange that he wouldn’t go on a carousel horse.  He was okay sitting on my lap on the carousel bench though.  He had trouble with grass and sand.  He overcame his fear of sand when he was 3, and started to enjoy the beach.  He is still scared of the ocean to this day.  He had a lot of trouble with photographs.  He would be in the picture, but never smile or just turn his head away.   He refused to be in any group pictures at preschool as well.  When he was one and two, he refused to wear swooshy track pants, silky or heavy team jerseys, and snow pants.  He also hated band aids and would throw a fit if we tried to put one on.   Flip flops used to be a major issue too, but he wears them now no problem. 

In the fall of 2012, we started attending a preschool run by parents, so I stayed with him.  I really noticed that he was extremely anxious around other children.   He would avoid interactions with them.  He would talk to me and say things out loud, but had trouble participating in activities with the other kids.  He didn’t like sitting in circle time, even on my lap, and he refused to put his name tag up on the board during circle time the entire year.  At gym time, he would never crawl through a tunnel, never go across the balance beam, and would constantly jump off things if another child approached him.  He would run around and be wild in there though, zooming fast on ride on toys and running around interacting with me.  He never seemed to go with the flow though and still doesn’t.  Often there is a lot of resistance.

In February 2013, Thomas also started a 2 ½ year preschool program.  I dropped him off for 2 days a week for an hour and 45 min. each time.  He never had trouble separating.  When I picked him up, he seemed to have enjoyed it.   When I had a school conference with the teacher, she said she couldn’t evaluate his speech because he had never spoken in class!  I was so surprised he wasn’t speaking, because he spoke great and constantly at home.   He would only nonverbally respond at school.  The teacher said he was very comfortable in the classroom, but had trouble on the playground.  When he still wasn’t speaking by the end of the school year, she had mentioned the term selective mutism and also sensory issues, since he refused to have his hands traced, painted, etc.  and was uncomfortable on the playground equipment.  He never liked having his hands get dirty when he was young either.  These hand issues have now resolved (no longer an issue at age 4.)  We still have tremendous trouble with Thomas's feet though. Toenail cutting takes 3 people!

I started researching selective mutism online and word for word this was my son!  It felt wonderful to finally understand what was going on with him, but terrifying at the same time.  In the process of learning about sm, I stumbled upon some video from the Smart Center in PA.  There are very few places that specialize in sm and people travel internationally for treatment.  I was so thankful that the Smart Center was driving distance from us.  In March 2013, I made the call to the Smart Center.  It was the beginning of our journey to help our son.   We made an appointment to speak with a staff member to go over what treatment is like and after discussing the costs and time comittment with my husband the decision was clear.  We got an August appointment.   We had our second child two months prior in June and the rest is history or more like one big blur.

Let's be honest to start off though - This first year of posts in my blog (2013) were not written in 2013.  As a mom to a newborn and a 3 year old undergoing sm treatment, a blog was the furthest thing from my mind!  I started this blog in 2014 as a private journal just for myself to keep track of all we had done and all Thomas had accomplished.  I realized that so much of what I was writing could benefit so many others going through the same struggles and questions, that I felt I should share it.   It is not perfect.  You will find some grammar mistakes or run on sentences along the way, but my hope is that it can help other children and families going through the process.  There are so many joys, frustrations, fears, celebrations, doubt and questions along the way, but I have never given up and my son has benefitted immensely from this.  This blog is our journey.  I hope it helps you and your family.  Please feel free to send me a comment or question anytime!