OT with Liam - working with food

On Tuesday, we packed up a lunch bag of two preferred foods and two non-preferred foods to take to Liam's occupational therapist for the beginning stages of dealing with his gagging on foods.  For his preferred foods, I brought two crunchy foods which is the texture he enjoys.  For his non-preferred foods, I bought scrambled eggs and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  He has always had trouble with eggs and more recently the gooey texture of pb&j and bread.  I stayed in the waiting area, so that they could observe him without me.  They wanted to make sure it wasn't more behavioral than sensory related.

The results:  He ate some of each, but they approached it in a different way.  They took a big piece of paper and drew two rows of boxes putting a little of each food in the boxes.  They alternated a non-preferred food and then a preferred food.  If he ate a bite of the non-preferred food, he would then get a bite of the preferred food.  The therapist was very happy with the results, and there was very little gagging.  We will continue to do this each week with different foods, but her inital thoughts are that approaching foods he dislikes in very little doses, along with preferred foods is a good way to go.

So tonight, we had chicken that Liam always has trouble with.  I completely forgot about giving it to him in small doses, as the chaos of my house at dinner time makes rational thinking almost impossible!  Anyways, when I served everyone their dinner, Liam started gagging when trying bites of his chicken.  He asked if he could do the "little squares" like at therapy, and I was happy to try.  So I got out a piece of colored paper, drew some boxes and started putting different pieces of his dinner on it, the way the therapist had showed me, and would you believe he ate every piece without gagging!  Seriously!?!  My husband and I just stared at each other in amazement!  Yes, it is a mess and inconvenient, but it works for now.  I may never truly understand what goes on in his little brain, but for now he will be eating his dinner off of construction paper with little squares :)

Thomas's sm progress at school

I am truly thrilled with how well school is going this year for Thomas.  All the hard work over the past few years is truly paying off.  He is having no problem separating from me to get in line at school in the morning. He is happy when I pick him up and has several friends he enjoys playing with.  I spoke to his teacher at back to school night and asked her if he was speaking and she said, "Oh yes!  He is answering questions and asks all the time when snack is!"  Ha!  That definitely sounds like him :)  The other day the school psychologist came up to me and said "I have to tell you something.  I was in the lunchroom yesterday and was trying to get the kids to quiet down for an announcement.  Thomas and his friend were talking up a storm and I had to call his name five times before he heard me and quieted down."  We both laughed and I told her that I was so happy he was getting in trouble for talking!

If you are discouraged right now and feeling overwhelmed with your child who has sm, believe me I have been there.   I always had hope that we would get to a good place eventually, but along the way  there have been lots of tears, frustration, anger, worry, doubt and sadness.  Check out my June 18, 2014 post.  With the right therapy, support and hard work it will get better.  Check out these before and after pics of my son.  The first is him at school 3 years ago and then the other two are of the first day of school this year with his friends.  Night and day.

3 year old school pic.  During 1st year of therapy

First day of school pic with best buddy this September

Being silly with friends

Sensory play take 2- Fun with homemade gak

After the shaving cream fail, I wasn't sure how homemade gak would go, but I wanted to give it a try.  I had the boys help me make it and pick the color it would be.  They loved seeing it transform from a water mess into a blob when we added the borax.  Liam was very hesitant to touch it and gagged a little.  I gave him some play doh tools to use with it first and eventually he started holding it in his hands.  Usually when I try to do something crafty with the boys it last all of about 5 minutes, but this was a hit!  They played with it for a good 30 minutes- stretching it, rolling it, smelling it, sticking things in it.  Lots of good sensory input.  We will be doing this again.  It only took about 5 minutes to make.   Here's the recipe we used:

Ingredients

• 8 oz bottle of regular white glue (Elmer's or generic is fine, just make sure it's school glue, not tacky craft glue)
• 1 teaspoon Borax 
• ½ cup of water and
• 1 cup of water
• Food coloring

Instructions

1. Empty the entire bottle of white glue into a medium sized bowl.
2. Add food coloring (the more you add, the brighter it will be).
3. Fill the empty glue bottle with water. Shake it up to try to get some of the leftover glue out. Pour the water into the bowl.
4. Stir the mixture until it's smooth.
5. Add more food coloring and stir again if you want a brighter color.
6. Dissolve 1 teaspoon of Borax in ½ cup of warm water. If you have trouble getting it to dissolve, put the mixture in the microwave for 20 seconds at a time and stir until it's dissolved.
7. Stir the entire Borax mixture into the glue mixture. It will almost instantly get stringy and turn into slime!
8. Kneed the rest by hand until all the water is absorbed.
9. Store in a large freezer bag when you are done playing with it!

Shaving cream sensory play fail

In talking with Liam's OT, she encouraged me to do more messy sensory play at home.  I had to do this with Thomas when he was younger too and it helped him a lot with having paint on his hands, sticky food etc.  Liam though is much more strong willed and he sure exhibited that today!  

I dug out some shaving cream and asked Thomas to join us in the activity so Liam could see that big brother could do it.  We covered some baking pans with foil and squirted shaving cream on top.  Immediately Liam looked concerned.  He loves smells so I poured some pink kool aid mix into it, but this did not help.  Thomas put his hands right in, but Liam just observed.  Eventually I got him to stick his hand in for about 2 seconds.  He flipped out, wiping pink Kool aid shaving cream furiously all over his clothes to get it off his hands.  Looking back, I should have let him start with some toys to play with in there rather than go for putting his hand right in.  Will try again another time.

OT eval for Liam

So the gagging and throwing up of foods and the avoidance of playground equipment has really increased over the past month with our youngest son Liam, so we decided to go through our insurance and get an OT eval through a higly recommended provider.  Since he doesn't have the anxiety that Thomas has, we didn't feel he needed a specialized out of pocket therapist.  Liam did great through the eval and did everything they asked of him.  They did feel he would benefit from OT for an 8 week session to start, which is what our insurance currently provides.  My husband and I knew that adding yet another therapy to my daily schedule would be stressful, not to mention it is a half hour away, but we both felt we needed to give it a try.  They will be doing swing work, some core strenthening, gross motor skills work and also feeding therapy.  He had his first session today which went well and next week I will be bringing preferred and non preferred foods for them to work with.  Very curious to see how they will work with him through his gagging issues.

Soccer update

Thomas continues to get better and better at soccer.  He happily ran onto the field for practice this week and had a great time.  He even ran with the kids for scrimage, although he wanted to be nowhere near the ball.  At least he was on the same side of the field :)  His confidence is growing and it makes us even more confident that having him try soccer was a good decision.

His 2nd game went pretty well.  He is atleast running to stay on the same side of the field as the other kids.  I just met a mom from another team who's child is still refusing to go on the field to play, so we are not the only one with a child who is nervous about playing.  I don't think Thomas has touched the ball yet during a game and other kids just take over when he is out there, but I honestly don't care.  He is braver than he will ever know.  Most kids on his team have been playing since they were four, but I think by the end of the season he could be right there with them.

As a mom, it is so easy to want to protect your child from things that make them nervous and scared, but more and more I am realizing that getting through uncomfortable challenges really builds Thomas's confidence and ours in him.  Soccer has not been easy for him and there have been lots of awkward, frustrating times for us as parents as well, but each week is getting better and easier for all of us.  We keep encouraging him and acknowledging his scary feelings and gradually confidence is following.

First soccer game

Thomas was reluctant to go to his first soccer game this morning, which is no surprise since the actual playing the game part is what he is struggling with.  He is saying he is scared, but can't put into words what is scary about it.  Thomas needs time to process things before he reacts.  He likes to observe and really think before he acts.  Soccer is so fast paced and quick reaction time is essential that by the time Thomas processes everything and is ready to react, they are onto the next play.

The game started and he just stood in one spot on the field nervously picking at his nails, which he does when he is nervous.  Can you spot him in the picture below?  It is so hard to watch.  My heart is breaking for him and you just know there are other parents wondering what the heck he is doing.  As his mommy, I had to fight the instinct to run and swoop him up to save him from those uncomfortable feelings, but I know in the long run these challenges will only help him grow.

His coach did get him involved when he could by choosing him to do most of the offside kicks and face offs, which he has no problem with.  I reached out to his coach at the beginning of the season to inform him of some of the difficulties Thomas might have due primarily to his spd.  He has no problem talking on the field.  By the end of the game, you could see he was gaining some confidence and started running a little bit with the kids.  When the game ended, he came off the field smiling and was really proud of himself.  We were too.  Some people who know about Thomas's SM and SPD asked if we will continue the season if he has trouble with it.  Our answer is "Yes, absolutely!"  He may never be a star soccer player (or maybe he will) but he is trying his best and is the bravest one out there in our mind.  He is learning new skills and teamwork while facing challenges and isn't that what sports are all about?

Soccer practice

Thomas continues to amaze me at how comfortable he is getting doing all the soccer drills.  I know this would not have happened last year.  He is actually pretty good at handling the ball and did really well with all the kicking, dribbling and shooting drills.  Pics of him below in neon yellow shorts.

At the end of every practice though, they do scrimages and this is where his fears kick in.  He just freezes in place on the field while the other kids run around him.  Baby steps. It's painful to watch, but I'm trying to focus on the fact that he is doing great going on to the field and doing drills.  In time, I think he will get there.

1st day of 1st grade was a success!

The first day of school is finally here!  We talked about it a lot, met his teacher and saw the classroom prior to the first day and also visited where Thomas would be lining up.  We made plans to meet his friend at his house so they could ride bikes to school together.  On the first day, the whole school all lines up by class on the blacktop.  It is very chaotic with nervous children and parents all trying to find their class spot, but Thomas seemed very calm.  I helped him find a few friends and he started talking with them like it was any other day.  I saw some of his classmates crying and clinging to their parents and couldn't believe that wasn't us!  I was so proud of Thomas.  He even led his line in to the first day of school.  I feel like I can let out a breathe of relief now.  Day 1 down, 179 to go!

Back to school tips for children with sm

Tomorrow Thomas starts 1st grade.  I cannot believe it!  He was a little nervous, but also excited tonight. We talked a lot about what would be happening tomorrow and where he would be lining up to go in.  This article has some really useful tips for children with sm, as they get ready to begin the school year.  We have implemented several of the tips mentioned in this article into our back to school prep and it definitely helps ease the anxiety.  Knowing what to expect really helps ease Thomas's worries on the first day in a new class.

Tips for Helping Kids with Selective Mutism Go back to school

Meeting Thomas's new teacher

Each year, right before school starts, we schedule a time through the school psychologist to come in for about a half an hour to meet Thomas's new teacher.  It lets him see his new classroom and meet his teacher, so that the first day won't be so overwhelming.  I also give the teacher an "About my Child" sheet with some info about Thomas and how to best interact with him.  This was recommended through our treatment at the Smart Center and it has been a great resource for all staff who interact with him.  In the past year, I gave one to the art, gym, computer teacher, etc as well.

Last year, he had some trouble with this meeting, because there is a lot of attention on him and it is a new situation.  I was hopeful that this year would go better, as he was very verbal for the majority of last year.  The speech pathologist, who he is very close to met us in the hallway and he was verbal with her, which was great.  As we got to the new classroom though, he went mute and was unable to verbalize anything to the new teacher or to the SP inside the classroom.  I asked some choice questions and he would respond to me in a whisper, so it is a start.  I am hoping that he warms up quickly like last year.  I am not that worried, because it is a new situation that he will need time to adjust to.  He has two close friends in his class, which I think will help a lot.  The beginning of the school year is always a little nerve wracking for any child.  Hoping he will settle into a routine quickly and have a fabulous year!