Tough Halloween-but not why you may think

Our family went to the Halloween parade last night in our town and had a great time.  The kids went in their costumes and Thomas was taking candy from people handing it out, waving, and answering questions.  We were very proud of him.  Unfortunately that night he told me his ear hurt, which I know means an ear infection is coming on.  Sure enough, the next day he had a fever and was in a ton of pain.  He was so sick all day and did not get to go trick or treating or to his party.  I was so sad for him.  He was so excited about this day.  I was also so curious how this year would go, since last year was a disaster, but we’ll just have to wait one more year. 

School vision test

Thomas had a vision screening test at school today.  We got a letter sent home about it a few weeks ago and I completely forgot about it, so I didn’t prepare him for it.  When I picked him up from school, he happily told me that he got his eyes checked today.  'Crap!'  I thought to myself  'I wonder how that went?'  When I opened his backpack there was a slip with three boxes.  One basically said he passed, one said he didn’t pass and one said it wasn’t possible to screen your child’s vision, because of nervousness, shyness, lack of attention, etc.   I was so happy to see that the passed box was checked off!  I know that this time last year it definitely would have been that third box-unable to screen.  I was so proud of him that he did this with the nurse he never even met before and was verbal.  Big progress!

Top 10 things that have helped Thomas become verbal in preschool this year

I have been thinking a lot about Thomas's progress and asking what caused this change. I am confident that 10 things have made a HUGE difference!

1. I had A LOT of meetings with the child study team prior to this school year, so we were all on the same page.

2.  He is in a supportive public school system now with a lot of support staff.
3.  He has an IEP, so everyone knows what needs to be done to help him succeed and are following through with it.

4.  I did an enormous amount of cognitive behavioral therapy work with him and the school this summer to lay a great foundation for this year.

5.  I set up teacher and classmate playdates over the summer and during this school year.

6.  He is one year older and more able to express his fears and discuss his feelings.

7.  I truly am his biggest advocate.  I continue to tirelessly devote the majority of my time to him and
     his therapy.  I also spend countless hours reading books about SM and SPD to better understand his
     needs.
 
8.  I really feel that the open line of communication between his new school and I,  plus the caring, 
    dedicated staff really have made all the difference in how well he is doing now. His teacher is
    awesome! 

9.  We are much, much, much more knowledgeable about Thomas's selective mutism needs than we                  were starting school last year.

10. We discovered Thomas also has SPD and have begun a sensory diet and semi regular OT. 

Standing tall!

Thomas really made some great progress at school today. After two days of standing up for half of the pledge, he stood for the whole thing today while holding his teacher's hand. I brought up the pledge over the weekend and asked him if he thought he'd be ready to stand for the whole pledge while holding the teacher's hand. He was a little on the fence, so I told him to think about it and threw in the motivational factor that if he was ready it would earn him 4 stickers on his chart. This way he could decide for himself, no pressure.

He also did something VERY big today.  He raised his hand when the teacher asked a question at circle time.  This is such a big deal for a child with SM, because in doing this, it puts a lot of attention on them if called on.  Of course he was selected and was able to answer the question.  He was so proud to tell me and the teacher was too.  What a confidence booster for him.  I am so amazed at how much progress he is making this school year.  A complete 180 from last year. 

Overcoming obstacles at school one step at a time

When we met with Dr. E. last week she said something that really resonated with me.  She drew a picture of steps and said "While most children can go from one step to the next, Thomas may need several baby steps to get to the next step. 

As I mentioned before Thomas wasn't standing for the pledge.  In my meeting with the child study team last week, we were discussing whether it was behavioral or sensory.  I honestly don't know what is going on in his little mind, but I truly believe it is sensory related in some form.  I explained the "baby steps to get to the next step approach," to them and it clicked with them too.   Instead of going from not standing for the pledge to completely doing it, we needed to break it down.  I suggested if the teacher held his hand this might help and they suggested that maybe he could stand for a few seconds and then sit down, slowly building to standing the whole time.

I had a talk with Thomas about seeing if he could stand for a few seconds just holding his teacher's hand and he smiled.  He liked the idea of holding her hand and the next day he stood for a few seconds.  BOOM! 

Another one of our goals is for him to raise his hand during class.  So far he is practicing in the speech therapists office and we'll go from there. 

Every baby step is truly building his confidence.  Such a simple concept with very powerful results!

Moving right along

Every October one of our favorite things to do as a family in the fall is go to a little town in Pennsylvania.  We headed out on the road with our pumpkin spice coffees and juice cups to admire the fall foliage along the way.  It is a beautiful drive up there.  It is the perfect fall trip for our family because there is a great play area for the kids, great food for my husband and great shopping for me.  Our first stop is always the kids zone place where the little ones can get out some energy before the adult fun of eating out and shopping begin. 

Thomas has been coming here every year with us since he was one, so it is so interesting to see what play areas he still likes or has grown to like each year.  They also have an gorgeous carousel.  The past 3 years he has only wanted to ride on the bench, preferring this sturdy non- moving piece to the galloping horses that move up and down.  This is our first visit here, since we have discovered he has SPD, so it all makes sense to me now.  Oh how many times we tried to get him on a horse.  Poor him.  Poor us.  None of us knew why this was so hard.  Now that we were enlightened and have been making great progress with OT, I was so curious as to how this would play out this year. 

We didn't want to push the carousel on him, so we started out in the play area in the back.  He played at the water table, in the ball pit, and on the fire engine.  Then he did something that really amazed me.  They had a few kiddie rides, like you see outside an arcade or at a store where you put a quarter in to make them move, and one was a mini carousel.  He jumped right on a horse and wanted it to move.  If you read my post from August regarding moving rides, you know he is not usually a fan.  Today he not only jumped up on the horse voluntarily, but also wanted it to move.  We immediately pushed the button before he changed his mind and he loved it.  From there it opened the door for me to ask him if he wanted to ride a horse on the real carousel.  I was waiting for a loud "No" but instead heard an excited "Yes."  Again before he changed his mind we excitedly made our way over to the big carousel at the other end of the building.

He was a little nervous when it was our turn to get on, but as long as I held onto him tightly he was fine.  He was nervous, excited and proud of himself the whole ride and so was I.  This picture was taken by husband who was sitting on the carousel bench with Thomas's one year old brother who, surprise, refused to get on a horse!  One out of two ain't bad. There's always next year and now I know that one day he will be ready too.  For now I am excited to check off yet another fun thing that doesn't hold Thomas back any more.  Seeing him enjoy the ride without fear and with a smile on his face reminded me of how far he has come and how far he will continue to go!

The little things!

Moms of special needs children know that little things that other parents don't even think about can be huge things to us and our children.  We have made a lot of progress since my last post in July.  Thomas is doing very well in preschool.  He is verbal a lot of the time, which I attribute to our continued cognitive behavioral therapy games, OT and his new very well structured preschool with a teacher who understands Thomas's needs.  After two months of OT, Thomas is now sliding down many slides.   It was amazing to see him go down a slide without me at the bottom or sliding down with him.  This was a big cause for celebration!!

There is one slide though that he hasn't been ready to tackle.  It is a very steep slide, that even I thought was a little scary, on his school playground.  They go on this playground at recess and after school we often stay so he can play with friends and I get to observe how he does on the equipment.  All his friends can go down it and it has been affecting his play with them at times, because he won't go down this particular slide.  He has to go all the way around to the steps.

Thomas and I had a chance to go to his school playground today for a little bit by ourselves.  I thought if we practiced the slide when no one else was there watching, there would be no pressure on him.   Well all it took was going down once holding my hand and then he decided he was ready. I was really happy for him and could tell how proud he was of himself.  He was even climbing up it which takes a lot of strength since it is so steep.  Good proprioceptive work too!  He must have gone down it 100 times after that. Now he is confident on all 7 slides on his playground.  I really think this is all due to his sensory diet and therapy we have implemetned in the past 2 months.  This may not be a big deal to many parents who's children can go down all the slides right away, but for us this was an enormous success worth celebrating.  I could tell how proud he was of himself and I was so proud too!